Like Sheep

This morning I woke up debating if I should do a workout or go out to the garden for a bit. The call of the garden won and the moment I stepped out my front door I was so thankful I chose going outside. It was a breathtaking morning. Every different kind of birdsong was filling the air. The sun was warm and the breeze was light. After I grabbed my gloves and walked into the garden the sound of frogs in the pond delighted me. I just stood still in the sun and took a deep breath and said thank you, God.

It’s impossible to not praise God when all of creation around you is doing it.

There’s so many moments in my days when I stand, staring into space, wondering what I should do next. There’s always too many things on the to-do list. Do I move laundry or make lunch? Do I workout or go to the garden? Do I play a game with the kids or clean house? On and on it goes all day, every day.

This morning I chose the garden and it was so perfect and peaceful for a little while.

I had my coffee, my favorite shovel, and innumerable weeds to tackle.

And then, I made a bad choice.

For the last week, one of our ewes, Annie, keeps escaping. She’s decided one spot in the fence is an escape route, and despite an extra line AND a higher voltage fencer, she keeps getting out. But I thought, surely she’ll get it this time.

So I let them out. Within 10 minutes she was close to her chosen spot looking wistfully through the fence. I stood quiet and watched her. She looked around.

“Annie! Don’t even think about it!” I yelled.

She turned and started grazing.

A few minutes later I looked again. There she was, looking out.

“Annie! Don’t do it!”

She did it. She jumped right through. I heard the fence zapping her. The twins followed.

“Annie! You dumb sheep!”

So much a for a peaceful time in the garden, drinking coffee and weeding. Instead I spent my time trying to coerce her back into the fence. When she got close enough I grabbed her by the horns and dragged her to the barn. Now she’s locked up again, all because of her bad choices.

It made me think of this verse:

Isaiah 53:6 ESV
All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned—every one—to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all.

There are SO many references to sheep in the Bible. We are called sheep often. And I’ve been given the perfect visual daily lately about who we are.

We think we know. We’re sure we know. We are absolutely positive we’re on the right path. And the whole time we’re busting through the barrier God has put before us.

I don’t have an electric fence to be mean. It’s for my sheep’s safety. What Annie sees is greener grass on the other side. What she doesn’t see are cars, coyotes, and a lifetime of wandering if she gets really lost.

As smart as we think we are, we’re really just dumb sheep who can’t see past the green grass just out of reach. All too often I think I know what’s best but I’m really just hindering myself and blocking the blessing and safety God has for me.

As I was dragging her by the horns, heaving, sweating, and gasping, I asked God, how many times do you want to do this very thing to me? How many times am I being so dumb you want to just grab me and drag me?

It gave me pause. I thought about the fact that in those moments, when I’m standing and staring, wondering what to do next, I should be asking God what He wants me to do, instead of just busting through the fence not needing His warnings.

After all, He is the good shepherd. He really does know what’s best.

John 10:11 ESV
I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.