gifts – Desired Haven Farm

The other day David said, hey mom, take a picture of this! I turned and looked and he had built this 3D tower out of Jenga blocks that took me seriously minutes to figure out.

I immediately sent it to my oldest, Samuel, because he’d get it. We often call David Samuel Jr because their minds work so similarly!

They can picture something in 3D in their heads, turn it around in their mind and see it from all sides, and then build it or draw it. They are both amazing artists and designers.

I love to watch how their minds work. Both can sit quietly for hours thinking, strategizing, and executing something they came up with and it always awes me. And I love giving David time to explore this gift.

Even though I’m done homeschooling Samuel and can just watch how he’s put that gift into practice daily with his job, I’m still so thankful we homeschooled him. And I’m so thankful David gets that opportunity as well.

One of the great beauties of homeschooling is letting our kids discover their gifts and talents and give them time to try it out. Samuel would often grab some wood and tools and throw something together. In fact, he just did it the other day when he was over!

Each of us has a gifting or bent towards something. And it’s good to follow those! It’s ok if one of your kids is horrible at math and another excels at it. It’s perfectly normal if one reads at 5 and another doesn’t read until 10. Those successes and weaknesses show us where our kids’ giftings lie. It doesn’t mean you scrap math for the one who struggles with it, but it does give you the freedom to not stress over it.

I have a child who only made it to pre-algebra and even that was a struggle. Guess what? He’s doing just fine in the great wide world! He’s a successful, capable adult.

Let homeschooling give you freedom to pursue those talents and don’t stress over the weak spots! If we each evaluated ourselves, we’d find we still have weak spots!

I love this photo because it perfectly captures David’s personality. He wasn’t upset, just staring at the waves on Lake Superior contemplating and thinking!

One of my most vivid Christmas memories is of the Christmas when I was 13. My mom thought my sister and I were collecting dolls so she put a small doll in each of our stockings. That Christmas morning we got up, excited to see what was in our stocking and I remember pulling that doll out, starting at it, and crying. I cried because it was the last thing I wanted. Them I cried because I made my mom feel bad. I kept that doll for a long time and actually really cherished it.

I think I came to realize how my mom had tried really hard to know what my sister and I were into. The thought really does count.

I’ve learned over the years that my top love language is gifts. I love to give others presents and really think about what they’d like and use. I love getting gifts too, but my real joy comes in giving them.

There’s another side of me though. I really dislike clutter and stuff in my house. And with 12 people living here, well, stuff accumulates faster than baby rabbits.

Something we’ve started doing is paying for a condo at the Dells for a few days as our gift to our kids. It’s an amazing way to spend time with them, give them something special, and not accumulate more than memories. I hope and pray this tradition can continue for years!

This Christmas the best gift I have received was my son coming home from the Marines and all my family being together under one roof. I wouldn’t need anything else this Christmas. My heart is full!

All my kids (and grandkid) in one place ❤

As I thought about how happy it makes me to have all my kids home, it got me thinking about the future. Someday more of my kids will move out and some will likely marry and have children. They will have their own lives which is awesome and wonderful and what we raise them to do.

But, I’ll always want them to want to come home. So that got me pondering what makes them want to come home. Social media will push perfect, Parade of Homes worthy houses, perfect decorating and flawless food.

Don’t fall for that and get stressed! It’s not true!

Here’s what it takes to have them want to come home: relationship. Always put your relationship with your kids before activities, events, work, projects, decorating, even cooking. Make it a priority to listen to your kids and be interested in what they like. Encourage them in their dreams and be excited as they pursue them!

I think the worst thing I could do is be judgemental of their dreams or cry over their wanting to launch.

Of course, I think there are a few simple homemaking things that help people feel comfortable in your home. I’ll share those next time. But those should never outweigh desiring a good relationship with your kids!

Tag: gifts

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