Tag: blessings

Happy New Year

On the last day of the year I was driving with my seven year old. I mentioned it was the last day and the new year started the next day.

“Was 2025 a good year?” He asked.

“Well, there were good things and hard things in it. We had some losses and we had some good things too.”

“So it was a normal year?” He asked.

I think all too often we have this unrealistic expectation that we “deserve” a good year or we shouldn’t have any hardships. We want comfort and ease and never ask for difficulties.

But that isn’t real life.

Last year we lost a close friend, a dog, a baby, a lamb, cars. Some were harder losses than others.

But we had good things too. Andrew got a new job that has blessed our whole family in many ways. Projects were accomplished. We had an amazing family trip to our cabin and everyone grew in so many ways.

Charles Swindoll said, “When I ask people when they really grew spiritually, they never describe an easy time. Never.”

We’re all going to face hardships our entire lives. Our mindset in it is what matters. Do you whine and complain and feel envious of those who seem to have it easy? Or do you ask God what He’s trying to teach you in it? Do you find the blessings in the midst of the difficulty or do you just focus on the negative?

Did you know that research has shown that how we think about a situation actually rewires our brain? It’s called neuroplasticity and I don’t think we truly understand the power of this. When we focus on the negative, we will continue to see the negative.

When we look for the good and positive, we start to see it more and more. We actually rewire our brain to see the good. It’s really cool! And it’s really real.

In the past two weeks we’ve had a lot. Truly, a lot.

Our son and his girlfriend came to visit for Christmas. It was our first time meeting her and then we all got sick with influenza. We had numerous Christmas events and in the midst of it all, our cat got really sick. Then we had to say goodbye to Isaiah and his girlfriend, whom we had fallen in love with.  I rang in the New Year with a child on the couch suffering from croup. Then we had to make the hard decision to put our cat down. It still sounds like a symphony of coughing in my house.

I could choose to look at all the negative. But I choose to see the good in it all. We got to see Isaiah and Karli and welcome her into our family. We went sledding and enjoyed good food. In the middle of the night with the croupy child, we stood on the porch letting her breathe in the cold air. She looked at me and said so sweetly, “I’ve never been outside at this time before. It’s nice.” (It was 3:30am)

Then yesterday, two of my girls got in an accident. It could have been so terrible but praise Jesus he protected them. They hit a snow drift and spun, sideswiping an oncoming car. Had he not swerved when he did, it would have been a head on collision. Again, I can focus on the terrible fact that they had an accident. Or I can thank God they are safe.

So, how are you wiring your brain? Are you going into this new year thinking it’s going to be “your year” and it’s going to be amazing and perfect? Or are you ready to look for the good and blessings in the midst of real life? Are you ready to thank God for the good and for the way He carries you and refines you in the hard?

I don’t look at all the hard in the last two weeks as a premonition of what’s to come this year. I don’t see all those things and think, oh great 2026 is going to be terrible. They are all just part of life. And God is so faithful. Every single time there’s something difficult, I see Him. I see His love for us and His goodness to us.

As you enter this new year, remember we aren’t promised all ease and comfort. But we are promised that He will never leave or forsake us.

Happy New Year!

The Most Important Work

I overheard this conversation a couple days ago…

Lady addressing two young boys: “What have you been up to with no school today?”

Before the boys could answer, Mom answers: “Going crazy!”

Lady: “Oh I’m sure. I bet you can’t wait until tomorrow!”

It made my heart sink to watch. The two boys shrunk and didn’t say anything. Then one piped up and said, “Well I WANT to go to school anyway.”

Maybe he does like school, but I could tell it was a bit of a rebuttal against the adult’s comments.

Moms, Dads, let’s not talk like this about our children, in front of our children. Let’s do better. Let’s be better. Let’s show our kids better.

Our society portrays kids as a burden, a stress, and an inconvenience. Many can’t wait to push their kids off on others or school and look at holidays and summers as just something to get through. There’s nothing wrong with having a break from our kids, don’t get me wrong. I need them and enjoy them.

We simply don’t ever need to make our children feel like a burden or as if they are unwanted. They are always watching and listening. They are learning how to relate to others and someday their own children by what we model. When we make comments like “I can’t wait until they go back to school” we’re speaking loudly about what we think of taking care of and spending time with our children. And they pick up on that.

C.S. Lewis very wisely stated, “Children are not a distraction from more important work. They are the most important work.”

If you choose to have children, remember they are little human beings that you have to raise to be big human beings. They someday have to relate to the rest of the world in some capacity and they learn from mom and dad more than anyone else in their lives.

What you say matters. How you spend time with them matters. Talking about them as a frustration teaches them something just like talking about them as a blessing teaches them.

Children are tough, don’t get me wrong. It’s not for the faint of heart to raise them up in the way they should go. But it is totally worth if it you stick to it. All of a sudden you have these amazing adults that count you as a friend, hug you when they see you with a big grin on their face, and are kind and generous to the world around you.

Believe me when I say, it’s worth it. When my adult boys hug me and say “Hi, Mom” or “I love you, Mom” I have to choke back tears. Every time. Did I do it all perfectly? Definitely not. Did I show them they were worth it and I loved them and they were a blessing not a burden? Yes. At least enough for it to sink into their hearts.

Even on the hard days, let’s choose to tell our kids, “I love you” “You are a blessing” “I love spending time with you”.

Weeping into Rejoicing

January. It’s kind of the worst month. Christmas is over, it’s cold, gloomy, and gray. Often there isn’t much snow and if there is snow it’s so cold outside you can’t go out anyway.

Add to it for me the fact that my mom died in this month and it’s a recipe for a downright crappy month.

I’ve tried hard over the years to find ways to enjoy this month. And things have worked some.

My fireplace, focusing on my sister’s birthday and my daughter-in-law’s birthday, finding good books to read, lighting candles, crocheting, browsing my seed catalogs. They have all helped me get through it.

But I’ve learned, too, over the years to let myself be sad. It’s ok to feel that and think about what I’m missing. It’s ok to acknowledge it sucks and hurts, even 23 years later.

And then, like I’ve said so many times before, I need to reframe my thoughts and look at the positive. Don’t say, well I’m not an optimist, so that’s not how I think. I wasn’t either, but guess what. You can retrain your brain! I did it. It’s possible. You can choose how you look at situations.

Does it still feel unfair that she was taken so young and just when I was starting to have babies? Absolutely.

But I know she’s in a beautiful place, fully healed, worshipping her Savior.

One thing I’ve learned over the past couple years, is that if you haven’t healed from your hurts and trauma from the past, it’s going to eek out sideways at those around you. I’ve been the recipient of it for a couple years and it isn’t an easy thing to watch or to deal with.

Every one of us has things in our past that hurt and affected us deeply. We can choose to sit in the yuck. But there are consequences of that. Usually you push others away with horrible behavior in some fashion or another. It’s worth going through the hard and hurt and fear and crud to come out on the other side healed.

It’s worth it for you and for those you love. So feel the sadness and grieve the loss of how you thought life should look. Feel those hard feelings and then process them, give them to the Lord, and ask Him to fill those hurt places. Get a counselor, a good godly one, if you feel you need one.

Whatever it takes, get healthy. It’s hard, but it’s much harder to carry the burden for the rest of your life, swinging it around at unsuspecting people and hurting them too.

I remember being so angry at God for a long time after my mom died. And I could have stayed there. But I saw what it was doing to me and to my family and it wasn’t worth keeping.

Now, I can spend a day sad that my mom isn’t here. And then I can rejoice the next day that I am and that the Lord gave me an awesome husband, 12 amazing kids, a terrific daughter-in-law, 2 grandkids, family and friends, and so many more blessings. I can smile knowing my mom is fully healed and restored.

Not So Hidden Blessings

Andrew and I were reminiscing about 2024 on the 31st.

We’ve been seeing all these memes about 2024 ending and 2025 coming. Things like

2024 says, “But did you die?”

No one claim 2025 as your year. We’re all going to walk in nice and slow like.

We’ve been laughing at them because, honestly, we can relate. But as we talked over the year, we were blown away by God’s faithfulness and constant presence.

We were devastated when our garden flooded and we lost everything, but God gave us rest we hadn’t had in a long time.

We were shocked when Andrew was let go from his job, but God gave Andrew restoration and healing after being so burned out. God gave release and freedom where there seemed to be none. God has provided each and every day since July 22nd.

We were blessed with three visits with Isaiah.

Because Andrew was off work, we were able to help Samuel and Liv fix up their new house.

God added to our family by sending sweet Eli.

God brought new friends into our life whom we desperately needed.

God forged other friendships deeper and purer.

He showed us who truly had our back.

There are always going to be hard times, difficult seasons, and trying circumstances. We live in a broken and fallen world.

But God.

He is ever present and working. He loves us and desires to bless us abundantly. Sometimes we just have to look at a situation differently.

So whatever 2024 looked like for you, ask God where is the blessing in this? Guaranteed they are there and he’ll show you!

Crazy Summer Recap

Well, it’s been a hot minute since I’ve been on here. It’s been a summer for the books! I think I just needed to process all the things and couldn’t quite put them into words.

First, we decided to start a CSA. Well, to be honest God decided we should. And that came with a while host of troubles. We had to prepare the area by ruling and discing, which a farmer friend was so kind to do for us. Then we had to lay cardboard with mulch and paper with soil. We spent days and days on it. And then we still had to plant! Meanwhile we got hit by a nasty storm that we think included a tornado. So our house needed new siding and roofing. And, we decided since we were doing all that we might as well replace windows. And since larger windows were going in the two living rooms, we decided to gut those two rooms and remodel them the way we have always wanted to. Sounds like if you give a mouse a cookie, right?

That wasn’t all for the spring. One of our oldest was getting married in May so there was wedding prep happening too. And our other oldest was preparing to leave for the Marines. Just a few things going on.

One thing that just takes the cake in the midst of all this, was the fact that the day of the rehearsal for the wedding, a local Ag sprayed the field adjacent to our property. It was an extremely windy day and the wind was blowing right at us. Everything on our property got hit by Round Up and another weed killer called Vector. We didn’t know it that morning but the days later when the weeds in the field were turning brown, everything on our farm was turning brown and crispy. And when I say everything, I mean everything. Our orchard, the CSA garden, our herb garden, my flowers by the house, my elderberry bushes on the opposite side of the property, my raspberries behind the garage, everything. It was devastating and I spent a lot of time and money starting things over in the garden and praying over the rest of the property. Things have slowly recovered but we don’t have apples or pears this year because of it. And someone who runs an orchard said it could be the years before our trees fully recover. It still hasn’t been resolved by the Ag, so pray they make it right.

So, now, suddenly the summer has flown by. I’ve spent countless hours in the garden tending to everything. We’ve had squash vine borers, cucumber beetles, squash bugs, grasshoppers, cabbage worms, blossom end rot, powdery mildew, fungus, lack of water, flooding… you name it. Sometimes I can’t even bring myself to walk to the garden and see what’s happening next!

And, the garden is now going crazy! It can take us two to three hours as a family to harvest everything. And then we have to separate and get things ready for pick up evenings. It’s more than a full time job! And I’m still bringing plenty in the house to can and freeze so we have good food all winter. There’s always a bin of veggies sitting in the kitchen waiting to be processed.

And, let’s not forget that the house needed to be fixed. So, we’ve been siding and installing new windows for the last month and aren’t even half way! You never really know how huge your house is until you have to side every square inch of it. The last few days the roofers have been here. They are hard workers and I’m thankful they are doing it and not us! That roof is a long way up there and it’s steep!

While all the tasks are happening, there’s relationships to be worked on, so to be planned for, and food to make (these people in my house eat A LOT).

Let’s add that my grandma passed away recently and we’ve been getting ready to celebrate her life. Have you ever had to decide whether to tell your son his great grandma died and deciding it’s best to wait until he’s done with boot camp? There’s other things too, I can’t even list them all.

At this point, I’m exhausted just listing all these things. I have no idea why God has handed us this cup this year.

But I do know He can be trusted. I do know He is good. I do know He is faithful and will NEVER leave us nor forsake us.

Often, we simply can’t understand what’s happening, even when we sit and analyze it. Even when we ask God why? In those moments we have a choice. We can be frustrated, complain, and grow bitter. We can choose to get angry at God or the situation around us.

Or we can choose faith. Isn’t that what faith is? Trusting our good and loving Father even when we don’t understand? It isn’t easy, but we can make the choice.

A friend of mine said to me recently, “you’re handling all this really well”. It got me thinking as to why? I think it’s this very thing. I’m making choices daily to be thankful and focus on the good. Because there has been so much good this summer too!

God moved in some mysterious ways this summer and yet when I look at it I can see His abundant grace and blessings in it! For instance, before it all went down, a dear friend called and said, “so I think the Lord is telling me to move in with you for June and July. Can I?” It’s now mid August and the Lord hasn’t told her to move so she’s still blessing us. I didn’t know I’d need her, she didn’t know she’d need us, but here we are thoroughly enjoying each other’s company and working alongside each other!

Pulling siding off, we found plenty of rot and windows installed incorrectly so water was just leaking behind them for 30 years! Thank the Lord we had to do this project and could find those issues before they became really huge problems! Even the roof had gaps and holes so they redecked the whole thing. By the time we’re done, we’re going to have what feels like a very snug new house!

Even though it’s been hard to process two kids growing up and launching, it’s been such a blessing to watch them find their path in life and really walk with the Lord in the way He wants them to. I can see His grace and mercy on their lives over and over and it’s heart warming.

We watched prayer heal our property too! We had so many people praying and plants we thought were completely dead are flourishing and producing! Many have said none of those plants should have survived and yet they are doing great!

So, in the midst of trials I’ll choose praise…

O Lord, you are my God; I will exalt you; I will praise your name, for you have done wonderful things, plans formed of old, faithful and sure.
Isaiah 25:1

In the midst of uncertainty I’ll choose trust…

Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.
Proverbs 16:3